What's old is new

marshes by flickr user *CA*

Brett:  Hey, why do you think words like yon rarely get used nowadays?

Lori: Hmm.  I don't know!  I like it.  Let's bring it back.  Cad, too.  That's a fun one.

Brett: That would be quite the accomplishment if we could get people to start using those words again.

Lori: It would.  We should also convert quag back from bog to marsh.  Though I'm not sure there are that many marshlands left nowadays.

The key to time travel

Potions Class Cauldrons by flickr user akimbokimono

Brett: Do you ever miss being in your teens?

Lori: I really enjoyed my teens actually.  If we put our heads together, we might be able to crack the time travel code.

Brett: I've always assumed it was some kind of potion: tail of newt, beak of parrot, etc, etc.

Lori: Makes more sense than, say, "hug of a baboon" or something.

Brett: Yeah, if we were making a time travel potion, I'd have to veto that as an ingredient.

Lori: What if we edit the baboon into a puppy?

Brett: Baboon, puppy, whatever, I just don't know how to include a hug when mixing a potion.  Ingredients need to be something tangible, like a wig.

Lori: How about a twig or something found shoved under a stair?

Brett: Those would work.  I'm glad these are ingredients to a potion, because this would taste terrible if we were making food.

Lori: If you torch it, it all tends to taste the same.

Brett: Well, then, why haven't we chowed down yet?

Lori: Alright, let's just go for it.

Word of the day

D words. by flickr user canonsnapper

Brett: Being debrided sounds like the worst thing that could happen to a married man, but actually it's a medical tratment.

Lori: It sounds painful!!  I didn't bother looking up the definition, but it can't be good for ones qis...

Are we funny? Or just funny looking?

Stirring the boiling milk by flickr user Plaid Ninja

Brett: Help me out with the punchline of a joke: What's the difference between pots and pans?

Lori: Um... You can only boil milk in one of them???

Brett: That's probably true.  (Though I've never tried boiling milk in a pan.)  But I'm not sure that punch line would bring me to the fore of the comedy crowd.

Lori: Yes, well... my comedy skills have been a bit lean of late.

Brett: I think you just need a confidence boost.  Here, let me introduce you: "Ladies and gents, please welcome to the stage the funniest person I've ever met, the secret love child of George Carlin and Phyllis Diller, let's hear a big round of applause for Lori!"

Lori: Oh, thank you, thank you... I bet with that intro you're wondering how a child of that pairing grew up?  Well... Ah... Hmm.  I think I need some more practice.

Brett: Well, let's not put you on stage yet, then.  I wouldn't want you to swelter in the spotlight.

Feel the rhythm, feel the rhyme

luge_lakeplacid by Clarkson University

Brett: Do you like the summer or winter Olympics better? I think I prefer winter, because
I like watching the bobsleds and luges go down the ice.

Lori: I don’t know that I’ve ever seen that sport. I hope to on the next Olympics now,
though.

Brett: Luge is pretty awesome. Part of me wants to start quoting Cool Runnings, since
bobsled and luge are related, but then the movie would have to be properly cited.

Lori: It would? I think we should discuss the rules of this forum. I’d like to avoid any
WWC fallouts.

Brett: Well, it seems unlikely they’d find out. If they did, maybe they’d be happy with
just a link that implies proper credit. (Which we already do, of course.)

Lori: Of course. For those rare occasions when the reader might not think the same way
we do.

Brett: Well, our readers can’t always think like us. After all, our high level of intellect
would leave most people in a daze.

Lori: Well said! Way to use your head there.

Brett: Oh, cut it out. You flatter me too much.

Lori: So sue me.

Brett: I’ll have my pa do it.

Lori: No, wait. It was just a figure of speech!

Brett: I guess I’ll pass the decision off to my lawyer.

The wonders of technology

parking meter in dc. by flickr user ashley jenkins.

Brett: Here in DC, they have a thing where you can pay your parking meter through an app on your phone.  It's pretty awesome.

Lori: DC life sounds awesome.

Acrophobia

St James' Spire by flickr user Cuth

Brett: Have you ever climbed to the top of a church spire?

Lori: No way!  I'm a little bitty scaredy pants about falling from high places.

Brett: Well, I wouldn't want to make you uncomfortable.  Can you stand atop an ox, or does even that height scare you?

Lori: I suppose that depends on the ox.  Is it large, is it tame?  If not I could get stressed.  And stress can cause zits.

Brett: If you bop a zit with a hammer, do you think it would go back into the skin?

Lori: Seems like that would hurt just a tad?

Brett: Act your age and don't complain about minor pains.

Lori: It's a hammer, fool!  No matter your age... oh, it's gonna hurt.

Where have you gone, Mr. Miyagi?

Karate Kid by flickr user Chitra Aiyer

Brett: I've been thinking about taking up martial arts.  Is there a dojo you'd recommend?

Lori: I've never been, sorry.  I did sew a hole up in one of Randy's uniforms once.

Brett: Did he also have a mask, or is that just for fencing?

Lori: No, I don't think he ever had a mask on for karate.