Check out that plumage

Peacock by flickr user I'm Wolfies

Lori: Do you find the plume of the peacock to be impressive?

Brett: Yeah, it's sexy!  Er... I mean... Yes, quite impressive as far as plumage goes.

Lori: Wow.  I must say your response sent me for a loop, but I agree.  Very impressive.

Diamonds are forever

The Daily Grind by flickr user haasbroek

Lori: Do you know if you can really make a diamond out of coal?

Brett: Well, Superman can.  If only we had a piece of his hair so we could clone him.

Lori: Wait a minute... Who do you know that has cloning capabilities?

Brett: Well, nobody, personally... But surely the yellow pages can set us up with someone.

Olly Olly Oxen Free

Untitled by flickr user foxpoint

Brett: Where do you think the phrase "olly olly oxen free" in children's games came from?

Lori: I'm not sure!  Wikipedia is unclear in its suggestions.  Maybe we should call a meeting with them to get an answer.

Brett: I've come to rely on Wikipedia always having the answer.  When they don't it makes me want to wail.

Bake your cake and eat it too

Ballpit by flickr user Davenpuerte

Lori: Are there any kiddy rides/games that you wish they'd make for big people?  Like... a giant ballpit for example?

Brett: A giant ballpit would be fun.  And think how cool it would be if they made an Easy-Bake Oven designed for adults!  Wait... I'm an idiot.

Lori: No, you're not.  I think it was a jolt of inspiration.  Make baking fun for grown-ups.

Brett: I guess it would fit the needs of some people.  How do you do it, though?

Lori: For starters, you'd need extremely powerful light bulbs.  Not sure if the environmentalists will have jived with that idea, though.

Join us at the feast

Feast by flickr user Martin Cathrae

Brett: I don't want to be one of those people who says the past is better than today, but... Why don't we celebrate feast days anymore?

Lori: They may just be too expensive for most people.

Brett: I thought you were going to offer to help me bring feast days back into vogue... Don't tell me I cored all these apples for nothing.

Lori: I'm sorry, I'll help you.  I'll figure out something to tap out over here.

Brett: We should consider taping a video invitation to our feast day, and encouraging others to hold their own celebrations.

Lori: Oh, yes.  I can see how that would help.  We could even create a forum so others could exchange their ideas... and recipes.

Brett: Great idea.  Maybe even a dedicated section for plum pudding recipes.  For some reason, I feel like they're going to be in demand.

Lori: Sure!! I mean, we need to meet the demands of the people!!

Brett: I'm glad you agree.  Seriously, you should have heard me heave a sigh of relief.

Lori: Really?  I didn't realize you liked plum pudding so much.. I'll have to try a bite.

Brett: I fear I've misled you.  I've never actually tried plum pudding.

Hooray for Hollywood

The Hollywood Sign by flickr user KiranAmbre

Lori: If Hollywood were to make a movie about us, who would you want to play you?

Brett: I'd say Ted Danson, but I think he's a little old for the role.  So I'm not sure.  You?

Lori: It's a tough one.  Uh, maybe Melissa McCarthy?  She's hilarious.  And I definitely think I'm hilarious...

Brett:  Of course you think that.  You are hilarious, duh!

Lori: Not everybody agrees with it.  My roommate doesn't think I'm funny at all.

Brett: That's blasphemous.  You should slap her with a gloved hand and challenge her to a duel.

Lori: Yeah.... I'm gonna take a pass on that.

Brett: I can't believe you would skip out on a golden opportunity like that.

Lori: I know.  I've resigned myself to this.  It helps keep the peace.

Yet more advice on what's good for your qi

soup kitchen by flickr user chiricahua sky island

Brett: If you had to do one thing good for your qi, what do you think would be best?

Lori: Start a riot?  No, no... I'm kidding.  Probably volunteer work.  Feeding the homeless or something.  You?

Brett: I was just going to say I'd eat some za, but after what you said, that would make me sound kinda heartless.

Controlling the wind

standing on the picnic table by Mat and Amie

Brett: Do you remember when you first met me?

Lori: Er... no.  Do you?

Brett: Well, no, but that's because it was shortly after I was born.  What's your excuse?

Lori: The earliest memory I can think of was around six years old.  That's the day my brother "controlled the wind" from on top of our picnic table.

Brett: I don't think I remember that.  Did he dance a jig while he was up there?

Lori: He did not.  But it's okay if you don't remember.  I don't think you were there.

Brett: Oh.  That makes me feel better.

Lori: Well, glad that's fixed.