The sugar plum fairies live in a van down by the river

Nutcracker 2011_Greater Niagara Ballet Company-289.jpg by flickr user Terry Babij

Brett: Are you a fan of The Nutcracker Suite?

Lori: Oh, yes.  I think ballet is fun to watch.

Brett: I figured you for the type that only like music that required an amp.

Lori: When I was little I wanted to be a lithe beautiful twirling ballerina when I grew up.  I um, I seem to have taken a different life path.

Brett: Well at least you're not living in a van down by the river.

Lori: That would be an unhappy end for me.

Brett: If you were living in a van, I'm sure that would tug at my heartstrings and I'd do whatever I could to help you out.

Lori: Aww.  Good cousin award.  I dig it.  Thanks.

Brett: Well, I'm sure it would go both ways and you'd do the same for me.

Lori: If you ever consider living in a van, my air mattress is available to you instead.  Free of charge.

Brett: That's a nice offer.  I hope it's not a lie.

Lori: Of course not!  You know you're welcome here.  Plus, lying is totally bad for your qi.

Brett: Yep, I know.